There have been whispers on twitter from regular posters… “I don’t keep outtakes… what shall I post?”
Until very recently, I used to delete anything I didn’t perceive to be perfect, especially if I didn’t think it showed me in a flattering light. I have a very tight frame of what images I allow of myself and don’t take pictures where I appear very often, either as selfies or as the catalog of family life. There are whole holidays without a single sign I was ever there.
I am trying to be more open minded. I see amazing images from other bloggers and keep pictures I’m not sure. Come back to them a little while later to see if I’ve changed my mind with distance.
There is a difference between a photo that didn’t work like this, because the shadows and focus were wrong… and something where I didn’t like the way my body looked in the image.
I loved the intent of this shot… and the lovely husband behind the camera loves it, and in its uncropped form with even more wobbly bits highlighted in the heated light of the chimneria and I guess posting it is an act of defiance against myself for feeling ashamed of said wobbly bits. For missing the mark with body confidence. Because if this was someone else’s body I’d be seeing different things in the image, focusing on different things…
There is one last photo from this fab child-free evening, but I’m saving that as illustration for Kink of the Week, as obviously these are outside photos…It is in my view the best picture, but there is part of me on it I hate, so I resisted posting it to begin with. Coming back to it a few weeks later, looking at it as if it were on someone else’s blog, I’m now committing to using it.